On Friday, June 5, 2009 our family became complete with the arrival of our third child Ronan Christopher Jones.
Before Labor:
Jonesy's mother came to stay with us so she could help out before, during, and after the baby was born. She has been amazing! We spent most of our days and nights staring at my large belly waiting and waiting. The kids have LOVED having Grandma around and were very sad to see her go.
When I went to my Dr's appointment on Wednesday, June 3, the Doctor checked my cervix and noted that I was already dilated to 5 cm (half-way there!). Since I was so dilated and had already had two successful deliveries in the past, she decided that I was a prime candidate for induction. She didn't have to ask twice. "Can we do it today??" was my response. We decided to wait until Friday since Labor and Delivery was full at the moment.
Labor and Delivery:
Friday morning, Jones and I woke up bright and early and got ready and left for the hospital at around 6:15am. When we arrived, I quickly got comfortable (not really, those beds suck!) in my gown with the monitors strapped to my belly. We waited and waited. FINALLY at 10am they started the pitocen (which is what induces labor and starts the contractions). It took about an hour before the contractions became regular and strong. We really should have brought something fun to do, but honestly didn't expect it to take so long. Oh, did I mention I was at 6cm when we got to the hospital that morning?
So Jonesy and I sat and talked and watched lots and lots of TV. The contractions were painful but the pain was very manageable. "Natural childbirth isn't so bad." I was thinking. At about 3pm my doctor came back and checked on me. My cervix hadn't changed at all! (very frustrating!) She decided to rupture my membranes (or pop my water as Jonesy called it). Then she left with no word on when she would be back to check on me again. At this point I was still managing my contractions very well. They hurt a LOT but I was able to relax and stay focused. 5 o'clock came and with it my contractions all of a sudden starting becoming stronger and stronger and pretty much right on top of each other (looking back, if I had been smart I would have realized I was in transition and the baby would be coming soon). Since I hadn't recognized that I was in transition, in my mind I was thinking that I was going to have to endure the never-ending PAINFUL contractions for the next few hours. This was not okay with me. I told Jones that I had decided I am a very weak person and I don't care if I failed at doing natural childbirth (honestly, how stupid was I to even think about wanting to try natural?!). Jones called the nurse in so we could ask for the epidural. We waited 5 whole painful minutes and she finally came in. I said I wanted drugs, she said what kind, I said the strongest and the fastest (the epidural). She told me she'd go call the anesthesiologist (the dude with the drugs) and get me an epidural quickly. 5 more PAINFUL minutes later, the nurse came in to deliver bad, horrible, terrible news. The anesthesiologist was stuck in the ER and couldn't be up for 20 minutes (honestly, what could be more of an emergency than this?!). I looked at the clock. It was 5:35pm. I decided I could wait 20 minutes (not that I had a choice). 15 minutes later, the pain was even more unbearable. I started feeling numb and tingly all over my body (especially in my fingers and my lips). I knew something wasn't right so I told Jones to get the nurse in. The nurses didn't seem to think it was a big deal so they were taking their time.
It was at that moment that I felt the urge to push. I told Jones and he said "don't push!" (what a stupid thing to say, dear) I think he was afraid a baby would pop out. He paged the nurses again and pretty much yelled at them to get in NOW! A nurse walked in and said she'd check me (acting as if I was overreacting and far from delivery). She slooooooowwwwwllllllly put her gloves on (at least it felt slow). At that moment the urge to push was so strong and the pain was so strong that I just couldn't handle any other stimulus so I closed my eyes. The rest of my memories are only of what I heard and felt. The nurse started to attempt to check my cervix but she didn't get very far. "Oh! We got a baby here!" she said (well, duh!) she directed the other nurse to run get a doctor and then instructed me to not push. "I CAN'T NOT PUSH!!!" I said calmly. (mind you, her finger was still in the position it was in when she discovered I had a baby inside me...I guess she thought she could hold it in?...) Jones was very helpful at inspiring me to not push and panted for me (I tried to pant with him but it was very difficult for me).
Remember, my eyes were closed this whole time. I heard the pitter-patter of multiple sets of feet running in and heard many new voices (all of which were saying those dreaded words "don't push") I am a rebel. I did a couple little pushes (I couldn't help it!). **I just want to describe here the urge to push I am telling you about. This urge that I felt could be described as the same urge a person has when they have the stomach flu. No matter how hard they try to not puke, it still happens. Can you imagine someone standing beside you telling you to not puke when you have the flu? Now you know a little bit about how I felt.**
Anyway. I felt the bed start getting taken apart and heard the voices of the doctors and nurses and new that the end was near. I took comfort in the knowledge that soon I would be meeting my little one for the first time and even more comfort in the knowledge that the pain would soon be over. Someone lifted my legs up on to the stirrups and said "okay, push". At that exact same time, the never-ending contracion ended. The urge was gone. (but only for about 10 seconds) When the next contraction came, I pushed and it felt good! (in comparison to how it felt to not push). After this first push the head came out. Jones offered up an explative. One more little push and the baby came out. As they lifted the baby up onto my chest the first thing I saw were some little boy parts. A BOY!! I was so suprised (and yet, very, very pleased). The second thing I noticed was his hair. Not red, but brown with a very real red tone...almost like a mix of Ruth's and Gareth's hair.
Our Sweet Boy:
Ruth was 6lb 6oz, Gareth was 6lb 15oz. This little boy was a whopping 8lb 7.5oz! OUCH!
We named him Ronan Christopher Jones. Ronan is a name that Jones has always liked (and it's the name of a REALLY cool character on Stargate Atlantis). We chose Christopher as the middle name because we wanted to name him after Jonesy's BFF (can it be called a BFF if it is about boys?).
Anyway, this sweet boy is perfect. Ruth and Gareth love him so much and won't leave him alone. Ronan doesn't seem to mind though.
Thoughts on Natural Childbirth:
I had to wait a few days before writing my thoughts on doing labor without drugs. If I had written them down within hours of going through it I would have instantly and very loudly said "NO! DON'T DO IT!!" My thoughts haven't changed much, but they have changed.
I don't regret doing it natural but I think I could have prepared a little bit better. For example, if I had been more informed about transition, I probably would have been able to recognize that labor was almost over and I wouldn't have felt as hopeless as I did there at the end.
If anyone asks me if I would do it again? I will say without hesitation: "NO WAY." I know what it feels like now, I know that I can do it and I also know that doing it with drugs feels a lot better.
If anyone asks me if I think they should try it? I would say "YES!.......Maybe........probably not" Honestly, I don't know if I'd recommend trying it or not. Like I said earlier, while I don't regret doing it, I also would never do it again.
Thoughts on Not Finding out the Gender:
This was very fun for us. We loved being suprised. It may not be for everybody but it worked for us because we already had two other children (one boy, one girl) and we had supplies for either gender. It was also good for us because if I had known before hand what we were having, I would have gone on a huge spending spree and purchased many things that we just can't afford. (seriously, the only things I bought before Ronan was born were fabric for a blanket, a diaper bag and one bottle).
